Last night, George Takei’s page shared an AITA post about a German woman who was upset because her American boyfriend refused to go to an “all-nude” spa with her. If you follow this blog, you might already know that I am an American, and I am a fan of the German “all-nude” spas. I’ve written about our experiences a few times, and based on the hits I get, I know that this topic is interesting to people all over the world.

It took me a long time to work up the courage to try a nude spa. Once I walked into the Palais Thermal the first time, though… (my very first nude spa experience), it took me very little time to join in the fun and bare it all. My very self-conscious, modest husband, Bill, soon followed. We both quickly realized that being nude in a German spa is no big deal. Everybody is nude, and no one cares what your body looks like. The focus is on wellness and health, not ogling and gawking. I was VERY proud of Bill for trying it, by the way. I thought he never would, but once he tried the spa and didn’t die of embarrassment, he became a fan.

It was with that truth in mind that I decided to leave a comment on George Takei’s post. I noticed several Germans “liked” my post, but one person– name of Sasha– decided to berate and insult me for posting that the American boyfriend “doesn’t know what he’s missing.” Sasha started by saying my comment was “ridiculous”, because just because I like something, that doesn’t mean everyone will. Then he (I’m assuming it was a “he”) continued by leaving uncivilized and insulting comments about everything from my intellect to my appearance.

The dude in Takei’s article later followed up with this conclusion…

I finally shut down Sasha after he said I “wasn’t very bright” by “agreeing”, with a laugh reaction and the comment “Whatever you say!” He “liked” it and fucked off, much to my relief.

I wonder what that was about. Was he looking for a fight with a stranger? Was his goal to try to humiliate me? I don’t think he got what he was looking for, because I just laugh reacted at him repeatedly, and resisted the urge to comment with annoyance or nastiness. I did advise him to keep scrolling or simply fuck off, if he didn’t like my comment, but his reaction was to continue being rude, rather than having a discussion.

I will agree that not everyone likes nude spas. However, this guy has obviously never even been to one, and would never even consider going to one. It kind of makes him a wimp, in my book. If he goes and doesn’t like the experience, that’s one thing. But by just giving in to the idea that nude spas are weird and make him feel “uncomfortable”, he’s definitely limiting himself. I wonder why he’d want to be an exchange student if he’s so afraid to try new things.

Put it this way… what’s the worst thing that might happen?

He’s not going to die. If he started to die, he would probably quickly be rescued. Germans are mostly great at rescuing people who are in medical trouble.

Does he think people will laugh at him?

In all the times I’ve been to nude spas, that has never happened to me. And I have a body that might inspire laughter. In fact, the vast majority of people who go are there to relax. They are focused on themselves, not you. The one exception is the time we went to the Mineraltherme near Stuttgart, and there were American teenaged boys there who had probably gone there thinking they’d see “hot” women in the nude. I am sure they were sorely disappointed.

Is he afraid he’s going to be “grossed out” by other people’s bodies?

If so, he might want to think about his attitude toward other people. We were all born naked. Everyone has “parts”. It’s not really a big deal if you see someone else’s parts. You can avert your eyes. Most people stay in the water, anyway, when they’re nude. When they get out of the water, they wrap up in a towel or a robe. In fairness, though, the Friedrichsbad isn’t really like that. The time we went there, we were nude pretty much the whole time.

While I understand that a lot of people are embarrassed and self-conscious about their bodies, it might be worth trying a nude spa. Personally, I find them quite liberating, but that’s probably because people take spa culture very seriously in Germany. The focus really is on HEALTH and WELLNESS, not sexual attraction, shame, or humiliation. It’s one very pragmatic aspect of German culture that I love. In fact, I am way overdue for a visit to our local spa. Almost all of the ones I’ve been to have been beautiful, peaceful, heavenly places. I’ve always left them feeling relaxed and wonderful.

While I might agree that the German girlfriend shouldn’t have bought tickets before talking to her American boyfriend, I also think he should get over himself and give the nude spa a go. He might be surprised by how positive the experience can be… and if it doesn’t turn out that way for him, nothing says he ever has to do it again. I mean, I tried going to a gynecologist and hated the experience, so I don’t go anymore. No harm, no foul. 😉