Tag Archives: repost

housekeeping tips, Military, rants

Repost: Launderette etiquette… dryer hogs!

I wrote this piece for my original OH blog on August 9, 2014. That means this post is exactly NINE years old! I’m leaving it “as/is”, so whatever’s in it was accurate as of 2014. I’m really glad I don’t have this problem anymore. Fair warning… there is minor profanity in this post. It was written when I still lived in Stuttgart.

One thing I have noticed that hasn’t changed in the years since we last lived as Americans in Stuttgart is that when it comes to laundry, people can be incredibly inconsiderate.  When we first moved here in 2007, doing laundry was an unpleasant weekly ritual.  In those days, Panzer didn’t have the huge hotel that it now has; they were building it as we were leaving in 2009.  Now that Panzer has a hotel and it has its own laundry room, the launderette doesn’t get quite as busy as it did pre 2010 or so.  But last time we were here, it was not uncommon for people to do tons of laundry during peak times, hogging washers and especially dryers, and holding up everyone else.

This morning, Bill and I took a trip to Panzer Kaserne to get our laundry done.  We had two small plastic bags full of laundry that needed doing.  I dreaded going to the launderette, because I spent way too much time there during our first tour.  The laundry room on Panzer has about 12 washing machines and, generally speaking, it’s no problem to get one or two of them without any waiting.  But there are only eight dryers and one or two of them are always broken.  That was true in 2007 and it’s still true today (there were two down this morning).  So that means there are only six dryers that can be used.

You get someone who needs to do a shitload of laundry– people who are stuck in local hotels or people who have a bunch of kids and need to knock out that little chore… and even people who have a place to live, but just want to avail themselves of a larger washer/dryer.  German machines are smaller and take longer to get through a cycle than American machines do.  All of these folks come to the launderette on a Saturday morning, the one day that most everyone has off from work.  They do a mass load of laundry, then proceed to use more than one dryer to dry their clothes, blankets, and whatever else they have.

This morning, I witnessed a man load up four dryers.  That’s four out of the six dryers that were operating.  I couldn’t believe my eyes or that man’s nerve.  I honestly couldn’t believe he thought that was okay.  Obviously, he’d never had to wait for a lone dryer to free up, right?

Granted, when the dryer hog loaded the dryers, I was still waiting for my washer to finish the last of its cycle.  But there were at least two people ahead of me who also needed a dryer.  One was a guy who ended up just leaving, seemingly in disgust.  The other was a nice couple here in Stuttgart on vacation.  As we were waiting for Mr. Inconsiderate to get a clue, another lady came in to do her wash, as did one who obviously just needed to use a dryer and left when she saw there was a line.  And then two or three other folks arrived and the launderette was soon very busy.

I admit, I got rather bitchy and more than a little passive aggressive, loudly commenting that I only needed one dryer to get my stuff dry.  The dryer hog, to his credit, did eventually get a clue and start freeing up machines for other folks who were waiting.  I did hear him say, though, as he was unloading and folding his laundry one machine at a time, “I know folks are waiting, but I’ve only got two hands!”

Dude… take your shit out of the machines and fold your clothes after they’re out so other people can get started!  Are you really that situationally unaware and/or rude?!  Jeez! 

The dryer hog did appear to have a number of friends, which makes me think he must otherwise be a nice person.  And I’m sure he thought he could get away with hogging the dryers on a Saturday morning.  I would say that if you’re at the launderette in the wee hours of the morning and you need four dryers, knock yourself out.  But on a Saturday after 9:00am, you need to be more considerate of other people who are also trying to get that one little pesky chore done.  We all want clean underwear and I’m willing to fight for the right to stain and stench free drawers!

It’s bad enough when people leave their clothes in a machine forever… don’t even get me started on the ones who do that with washing machines when there aren’t other others available for use.  But hogging a bunch of dryers just because you think no one else needs them is just a shitty thing to do.  If there are other people doing laundry, they are very likely going to need access to a dryer, unless they are fortunate enough to have access to a clothesline.  It takes longer to dry clothes than it does to wash them.  So when you hog four machines out of six, you really are screwing over your fellow Americans at the Panzer Launderette!

Bill was walking the dogs while I was waiting for a dryer and then my clothes to get done.  We weren’t held up too much and, unlike the cute couple I chatted with while we were waiting, I wasn’t wasting precious vacation time.  With any luck, we will get to move into a one room apartment for the next few weeks while we look for a more permanent place to live and then this issue will be a non-issue for me once again. 

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anecdotes, Military

Funny repost… “German fork language”

I don’t usually put reposts on my travel blog, because it’s a place for me to write about living in Germany and our travel adventures. But I just ran across this funny post from the Blogspot version of my original Overeducated Housewife blog, and I thought it might make a funny entry for this blog. So here it is, written September 7, 2014, and appearing here “as/is”. Please be advised that the language is a bit rawer than usual, because it was written for the original blog, and I tend to curse more there. I hope some of you enjoy it!

A few weeks ago, I ranted on my travel blog about Stuttgart Friends, which is a Facebook group dedicated to people in the Stuttgart area who are somehow affiliated with the US government.  I’m pretty sure there are some Germans and other European folks on that site, too.  While Stuttgart Friends and its many spinoff groups are generally very helpful, I notice that some folks get a bit uppity sometimes.

For instance, today someone posted a very interesting article about dining in Germany.  Given that a lot of Americans are not familiar with dining in Europe, it was good reading.  Many of us need to learn more about the local customs here.  Some people were commenting about things they had or had not experienced while dining in German restaurants. 

One person brought up how if you place your fork a certain way on your plate, it’s a signal to the server that you’re finished eating.  I usually put my knife and fork at about 3 or 4 o’clock on the plate and, sure enough, the server takes my plate.  Another person in the group dubbed this practice as “fork language”.

Well, I noticed that another person wrote a lengthy post about European table etiquette and how Americans are “backward” because, in general, we don’t eat the way Europeans do, with our knives in the right hand.  Her initial post was somewhat interesting, though it bordered just slightly on snob territory.  A couple more people, myself included, posted about so-called “fork language” and used that impromptu expression.  I thought it was kind of a clever term, even if it’s not necessarily official. It sounds almost sexy, though the possibilities of what one might do while communicating with fork language are endless and potentially horrifying.

An old video I recently watched about table manners… They mention not having to hold silverware the “European way”. Funnily enough, Bill holds his silverware like a European does.

Our resident European etiquette expert came back and wrote how she was taught proper table etiquette, not “fork language”.  She added a winky smiley, possibly to soften the blow of her holier than thou-ness.  How awesome indeed! 

Naturally, her comment annoyed me, because I’m not usually impressed by people who presume to school other adults in such a condescending manner.  Moreover, if she was really an expert in etiquette, she’d know that it’s rude to try to chastise and correct people in that way.  I mean, isn’t etiquette ultimately all about being graceful and making other people comfortable?  And before anyone brings this up, I do not claim to be an etiquette expert.  In fact, I delight in making certain people uncomfortable.  

But really, I’ve always thought being polite and showing proper etiquette was about being charming, civil, gracious, and kind, not making other people feel like boorish twits because they don’t know how to position their forks when they want their plate cleared at a restaurant or they decide to refer to table etiquette as “fork language”.  I mean, jeez!

So, being the smartass I am, I wrote, “Pin a rose on your nose…”  😉  (special thanks to Stephanie Tanner of Full House for that stale one liner…)     

I mean, big fucking deal…  So the proper term is “table etiquette”; that doesn’t mean the terminology can’t evolve and people can’t come up with new or creative ways to express themselves.  That person needs to get over herself. 

/rant

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books

Reposted book review: My Holiday in North Korea: The Funniest/Worst Place on Earth

Here’s a book review about a woman’s exotic trip to North Korea. I wrote this August 27, 2017, so I am reposting it as I did on that day.

Lately, my reading material has been kind of heavy.  I read several books about the Holocaust a few months ago, as well as The Handmaid’s Tale, a dystopian novel about women who are forced to breed for the state.  I also just re-read Alex: The Life of a Child, a beautiful memoir about a little girl my age who died at eight years old due to Cystic Fibrosis.  Although I had read that book several times, I decided to look at it again in honor of her father, Frank Deford, who recently died.  After all of those sad reads, I was ready for something funny.  So I picked up Wendy E. Simmons’ My Holiday in North Korea: The Funniest/Worst Place on Earth, which was published in May 2016.

For the life of me, I can’t understand why anyone would willingly visit North Korea, which is probably one of the most hostile places on the planet, especially toward Americans.  It’s not easy to get permission to visit North Korea and, once you’re there, you will be guided by “handlers”, who watch your every move.  You also run the risk of being accused of committing a crime and getting detained.  It’s not exactly cheap to get to North Korea and I’m not one to spend money on something I’m certain I won’t enjoy.  A few days from now, Americans will be banned from visiting North Korea by our own government, anyway.  While I am certainly no fan of Donald Trump’s, I do think that when it comes to North Korea, most Americans ought to stay away.

Nevertheless, despite warnings from the government, Wendy Simmons prides herself on traveling to far flung places.  North Korea was on her bucket list.  She decided to go and has written a rather irreverent book about her trip.  Simmons is a good writer and she’s a bit snarky, which I enjoy to an extent.  She includes a number of photos with references to Alice in Wonderland.  I suppose the Alice in Wonderland references would be my first critique of Simmons’ book.  I didn’t enjoy the references because, believe it or not, I’m only vaguely acquainted with Alice in Wonderland.  I don’t think I’ve ever read that book.  I’m certain that other readers haven’t, either.  Yes, I have been exposed to plenty of references to Alice in Wonderland, enough to recognize that was what Simmons was referencing.  But I think I would have preferred it if she’d simply labeled the photos in a straightforward way.

Anyway, Simmons writes about what it was like to visit North Korea.  She has a male driver and two female handlers, whom she refers to as “Old Handler” and “Fresh Handler”.  When Wendy is not locked in her dingy hotel, she is always flanked by her handlers.  She can’t even sit outside for fresh air without them by her side.  The hotel is pretty much empty, save for a few other brave tourists from other countries.  As a matter of fact, Pyongang, North Korea’s capital, seems pretty empty.  It’s as if it’s just a showplace intended for tourists.  I got the impression that no one actually lives there.

Simmons seems to develop a love/hate relationship with her handlers.  Old Handler is described as kind of passive aggressive, as if she loves hearing about the outside world, yet hates the people she has to guide.  It’s as if she’s extremely jealous of Simmons’ freedom, so she does all she can to curtail it when Simmons is in North Korea.  Fresh Handler is described as being much less jaded and somewhat more friendly.  The driver is gruff, though Simmons seems to develop a superficial rapport with him.  These three are charged with looking after Simmons, yet North Koreans as a whole have been trained to hate Americans.  I’m sure it was interesting to witness the cognitive dissonance between what North Koreans had been taught about the United States and Americans and what they experienced actually interacting with an American.

A lot of Simmons’ descriptions of North Korea are snarky and borderline disrespectful.  She sometimes seems a little too happy to laugh at North Koreans and the fact that they have been so sheltered from the rest of the world.  Yes, it’s funny in a flabbergasted kind of way… but it’s also very sad.  It’s not until the very end of the book that Simmons reveals some sensitivity toward the plight of North Koreans.  She actually acknowledges that she was fortunate to be born somewhere other than North Korea.  But then… perhaps most North Koreans are happy enough.  Can you miss something you have no concept of?   

I wondered about Simmons’ handlers and if they got in trouble for what Wendy wrote.  She doesn’t identify them by name, but she does include a photo of their legs.  My guess is that it wouldn’t be hard to figure out who they were, even just based on photos of their legs.  There were times when it seems Simmons was miserable on her trip.  However, I would be lying if I said I didn’t think some of her descriptions were funny.  I enjoyed Simmons’ writing style, which was witty and conversational, and I didn’t find her book a chore to read.  I do think she was a little mean spirited at times, though. 

Those who are looking for descriptions about what it’s like to actually live in North Korea are bound to be disappointed.  Wendy Simmons would probably like to know herself.  Remember, she was given a very sanitized look at the country.  She recognizes that she wasn’t allowed to interact with North Koreans, see their living quarters, or venture anywhere without her guides, who made she didn’t see or photograph anything that wasn’t government approved.  Even so, Simmons describes seeing brand new factories that had never operated and were watched over by guards who sleep on the job.  She describes sitting in on classes in school that are full of cherry picked students.  She attends a football (soccer) match that is clearly put on for her benefit.  She dines alone in the hotel restaurant, eating food that sounds very unappetizing and ice cream that kind of looks like a Creamsicle, but tastes bland.

All in all, it sounds like Simmons didn’t have a good time over her nine days in North Korea, but she did at least get to see it and write a book about her visit.  It’s lucky she has such a good sense of humor and can laugh about some of the sad things she saw there.  It’s even luckier that she managed to get out of there without being detained.

Buy My Holiday in North Korea on Amazon.com.

As an Amazon Associate, I get a small commission on sales made through my site.

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